A great greeting to you as a new month is starting. I would also encourage you to be determined for the best. This year is gradually running to a close, if your appraisal is done now, would you be above average? If not, kindly step up your game. Like the saying in Yoruba language, “Orun to wa loke to aso gbe” meaning, the sun above, can still dry the clothes.
We are looking at something interesting today. A young man left the hinterland for Lagos, Nigeria, in search of greener pastures, to live with his siblings. He met an old man, whose children had left the country for greener pastures, as well, in European countries. He became the backbone of the old man who introduced him to all his children and in turn, made them know that he had adopted for himself a son. The young man was delighted in helping the old man, while the old man expended the last of his energy in advising the young man. Fortunately, the young man’s parents had also younger people, within the community, helping them in their house chores. This made us arrive at the discussion, Adoption by Proxy vs Biological by Distance.
Adoption by Proxy is a state in which non-biologically related people are available, at the appropriate time, to care for others who are not their direct parents. Adoption by proxy is also a phenomenon where parents give their best to other’s children because they are the one accessible at that time. Life is dynamic, everyone wants changes. However, in the search for change, many people do not add their parents to their itinerary by visiting regularly etc, as such, the available person becomes adopted. Many young people had run into great fortune by making themselves handy to help these adopted parents.
Biological by Distance has started many generations ago since the exodus of people from their place of birth to other communities. An old man would not wait for his sons to come visiting to have a chat with them alone, so he would communicate with whoever is nearby. Do not think that all discussion can be done on phone, there are many discussions left “undiscussed” because of distance. Financial and other gifts can come to these parents but togetherness, companionship, family ties etc would be lacking.
The lessons from today’s discussion are: There are friends that stick closer than a brother, Proverbs 18:24b. You have the opportunity of making relatives of those that are available to you. Do not only of necessity be kind alone to your family members, learn to be compassionate to everyone you encounter in life. Learn to make relatives of those close to you. Also, do not be too far from your biological relatives as well. Blood is the greatest bond. Accept everybody as members of your family.
Wishing you a September to Remember!
(c)Olutayo IRAN-TIOLA, Lagos, Nigeria